The elusive “having it all” <<< I gave a talk about this in April at Align & Rise in New York
The premise of the talk was this:
- You’ve already got it all
- It’s about the journey not the destination
- You have a choice to choose a different perspective on how you view your own life
- Your language plays a big part in defining your reality
- Too many people pursue other people’s dreams without realising it’s not what they actually want
- It’s OK to want what you want and get it
- We don’t ask often enough for what it is we really want
- The notion of “having it all” is drastically skewed due to celebrity culture
At the time, I shared that on the outside looking in, it really does look like I have it all, but at the time, I didn’t. And I shared this honestly, openly, and vulnerable.
Back in April, I was in a very challenging relationship with the father of my now 8 month old daughter. I had flown to New York for a week to serve, and had to make the heartbreaking choice to leave my baby behind with my parents.
My businesses were doing great. My financial situation was strong. My friendships were powerful, and my health was OK.
But my relationship was suffering.
When we look at having it all, I believe most of us want success in these main areas:
Career / Business
Family & Friends
I was massively lacking on the relationship front, which was having an impact on my health, and my wealth (even though I didn’t realise it at the time), and even my family.
Walking away from that 6 year relationship with the father of my child was one of the hardest decisions of my life.
And the emotional trauma of the decision and the subsequent backlash has been heartbreaking.
BUT, the result of doing one of the hardest scariest things….
I have arrived in a place where I ACTUALLY HAVE IT ALL
And this is the real lesson I want to share with you
I wish I could have shared this back in April at Align & Rise, but I honestly wasn’t in that place.
Now I am
The trick to having it all, is doing the hardest, scariest, and MOST uncomfortable things
My relationship of six years was actually over years ago, but I subscribed to the notion of hard work, of compromising, of it just being “one of those life things”, and allowed what I want to disappear from sight, as I fought to hang on to something I thought I SHOULD be hanging on to.
Truth be told, I wanted a Prince Charming, a knight in shining armour, to sweep me off my feet, and show me the love I had dreamed about since being a little girl.
I wasn’t getting it. And so I compromised. I convinced myself ‘less than’ was enough.
And I didn’t realise the negative impact it was having on my relationships with my parents, my siblings and my close friends, who could see the emotional and psychological strain I was under, but were powerless to help me, because I’m too bloody stubborn, and was too invested in saving something which ultimately couldn’t be saved.
I also didn’t realise the stranglehold it had on my finances. I was making great money. But nothing compared to what I’ve made since walking away. I mean, THAT, is an incredible mind blowing story just in itself. Within weeks of walking away, I tripled my already huge turnover.
Most importantly though, I didn’t realise what that relationship was doing to my self worth, and my Soul relationship with myself.
Let me tell you… I am a freaking QUEEN. I am the Priestess of Light, and I really truly do have it all.
I have a new man in my life. My Prince Charming. The one I always wanted since being a little girl. A real life fairy tale.
I have more money, more clients, and more business success than I even thought possible.
My health has taken a huge abundant leap in positive directions.
Relationships with my family have blossomed as they witness me grow into the most abundant version of myself.
And Time is on my side.
All because I unravelled myself from all that did not serve me.
I have it all. I can hand on heart say, that I have it all.
Now it’s your time… let’s unravel all that doesn’t serve you shall we?
And move you into having it all. Your version of it. Your reality. Your co-creation.
My love always