To The Man….
Yesterday I wrote an ode to the dark side of the woman. Today I want to address the men.
Allow me to precursor this with an acknowledgement:
Not all men are the same, as not all women are the same. Not all women have suffered at the hands of a man, as not all men have inflicted pain on a woman. Much of the pain and abuse we inflict on each other comes from our own deep wounds. This is not a man v. woman campaign, as I do not subscribe to the dividers that keep us from wholeness. BUT, in an effort to move us closer to Unity, I feel there’s certain truths which would benefit our men.
To The Good Man (our husbands, boyfriends, brothers, friends & fathers)…
We know you’ve never raised a hand to a woman
We know you’ve never been unfaithful
We know you’ve never intentionally broken a heart
We know you struggle to understand us
We know you get frustrated by our anxiety & neurosis
We know you’re not to blame for the pain we’ve suffered
We know you think we’re crazy
We know you love us anyway
BUT, there’s something you don’t know
We will never receive an apology from our abusers
We will always bare scars, even if we’ve healed
We will forever carry the pain of our memories within us
Being groped on the dancefloor as a teenager is just as traumatic as being raped as an adult
Verbal insults wound just as deeply as hands that break bones
Psychological manipulation is just as murderous as the many female suicides it claims
You can’t understand this man because you’ve never been this man, and you can’t fathom why you’re paying the price for the crimes these men have committed.
Moreover, you can’t understand what it is to be the broken woman.
There’s a piece of healing that is needed to end this cycle for good. It doesn’t come from the woman, nor does it come from the bad man. It comes from you, The Good Man.
I once heard of a man, so solid in his embodiment of the Divine Feminine AND Divine Masculine, that upon greeting a group a women to speak on the topic of Unity, said “Before I begin, allow me to apologise on behalf of the Patriarchy, for all the wrong doings, and all the pain we have caused you. Deep bow, to you, the feminine, who carries the burden of femininity with such Grace. I’m making it my life’s work to heal the feminine and forsake all those who seek to harm you.”
To The Good Man…
We don’t expect you to save us, nor do we even expect you to understand the depths of Patriarchally inflicted pain.
But could you hold us a little longer? Forgive us a little quicker? Tell us you’re sorry we’re hurting?
Could you perhaps put all that you don’t understand to one side to show true love and compassion for us instead? Even for those of us you don’t know personally?
And promise to raise good men? Forsake all those who aren’t? Even challenge those who disrespect & dishonour us?
Will you speak openly, and live a life fully in pursuit of Oneness?
Will you discard all that divides men and women?
Will you share with us your own pain, so we can see you too?
To The Woman…
As a woman, I ask of you the same.
Will you do this? For all our sake’s.
My love always